Even when you know there was a good reason you and your ex broke up, that reason can become difficult to remember when you're looking into each other's eyes and laughing at inside jokes. Maybe that's why almost half of people have slept with their exes. But is it worth it to get back into a relationship, or will you just experience the same heartache all over again?
We got a few women to reveal what happened when they got back together with exes—the good, the bad, and the ugly—and it looks like it can really go either way. Here are some of their most telling stories:
"I did the classic long-distance thing my first year of college. My boyfriend and I broke up during the summer following freshman year. We got back together days later. We were each other's first loves and were too devastated to stay broken up. Then we broke up for good a few months later. I don't regret the long distance at all, even though it's a cliché. Most of the relationship was wonderful and worth it. That is, all except those last few months when we had gotten back together. Those sucked because I think we both knew it wasn't going to work. I still don't regret it, though, because I think if we hadn't gotten back together I would always have wondered if it could have worked out if we'd tried again." —Ellen, 25
"We didn't see each other for a while after breaking up. Then we had drinks and ended up having sex. I hadn't had sex in months, and I thought he was the only person I could be with (I don't know why I thought that). Then I saw in his Instagram that he was seeing somebody else, and suddenly I realized I wanted to be with him again. We got back together for a few months, and it was a disaster. Terrible idea. Now I feel so dumb for going back just because of insecurities and jealousy." —Alejandra, 31
"So many exes. Lots of rekindling. There's a reason they're exes. Leopards don't change their stripes. You kind of convince yourself that a remaining connection means more than it actually does. Like it's supposed to work out if people are still attracted to each other, but that's not the case. It usually unfolds in exactly the same way." —Jenny, 34
"I met Matt online when I was 25 and new to New York City. He was nice and smart and husband material, but I wasn't looking for a husband. When I broke up with him after about two months, I asked him to stay in my life as a friend. We were friends—with benefits—until I got partying out of my system and was ready to get married. We both dated other people—I even set him up once! But eventually we got married . Now we have two kids and live in the 'burbs." —Jen, 39
"I broke up with the last guy [I dated] a total of three times. Both times I took him back, I knew he wasn't good for me. I didn't even really like him that much anymore and knew my friends wouldn't approve... but I felt like I owed him the chance for some reason. The first time, he had just gotten fired from his job. The other time was a few months later, after a two-month split. It took another six months for me to realize my self-worth and leave him for good. I'm sure some of our problems were my fault, but in retrospect, he was incredibly emotionally abusive and had a way of making me feel like I owed him something, even when I hated how I felt around him. We've been broken up for seven months now, and I feel completely emotionally stable." —Nina, 31
"We broke up two times after our first breakup—for the same reasons. I don't think it was a mistake, as we had some really nice times when we got back together. But it ended the same way and just took up more of my life. I learned that it's important to get closure. We just stopped speaking when we first broke up, so getting closure the last time we split was really good. I didn't realize it was missing until I had it." —Amanda, 27
Have you ever gotten back together with an ex? Do you regret it?
