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New research reveals men spend seven hours a year hiding in the bathroom for 'peace and quiet'

We all have to use the restroom from time to time, sometimes at work or at home. But I don't think that most people would count using the toilet as leisure time. I mean, it's not exactly a form of entertainment to nip into the lavatory and void your bowels; and frankly, I'd be more than a little bit suspicious of anyone who thought so. However, this just goes to show how little I know, because apparently there are plenty of men out there who like to use the bathroom not to empty their bladder, but just for the sake of a little bit of 'me time.' In fact, research has now shown that men spend seven hours a year in the bathroom just as a form of escape.

Now I know what you guys are thinking: the fact that dues are apparently sneaking off to the bathroom so much must mean that they're doing something dirty in there, right? Well, get your mind out of the gutter if that's the case. The real reason is far more alarming than that. Apparently, a worrying number of men have been forced to retreat to the restroom for some peace and quiet after a particularly stressful day.

The research, which was commissioned by Bathroom company Pebble Grey, discovered via a poll of approximately 1000 men, that a large number of men are hiding in the toilet for a number of reasons, which include nagging partners, overly-energetic children, to avoid chores, and to look at their mobile phone undisturbed. This sounds like a pretty extreme measure to get some solitude. But the same researchers discovered that one in 10 male visits to the bathroom are interrupted by something anyway. Jeez; no wonder guys are so desperate to get away from it all for a while.

A spokesperson for the company stated: "We all need a little bit of time to ourselves - to take stock or switch off completely. And the bathroom appears to be the go-to place for those moments - it's very much a sanctuary, somewhere we can cut ourselves off from the outside world, albeit just temporarily. As the results suggest, peace and quiet is sacred and clearly, men take the opportunity to get this where they can - often in the bathroom."

Furthermore, an amazing 45 per cent of men polled stated that getting time to themselves is a struggle, while 25 per cent and a claimed that their partners didn't appreciate how busy their life was. Another 25 per cent of men even said that if they couldn't escape to the bathroom every once in a while then they "don't know how they'd cope," and another 23 per cent described their bathroom as their "safe place."

So next time you see a man surreptitiously heading towards the bathroom; don't think any less of him. Maybe he's just overwhelmed and could do with being left alone.

What I learned from Cheating on My Boyfriend About Men Who Fake Their Deaths

In the middle of reporting my book on death fraud, I got caught cheating on my boyfriend.

I'd been pursuing the question for years: can you disappear in the 21st century? I had interviewed dozens of devious characters—privacy consultants, fixers who forged death certificates, life-insurance fraudsters—and I thought they had taught me the most important thing about faking your death: how to cover your tracks. I just didn't know I would end up applying this lesson to my own illicit affair.

In my reporting, I had investigated all forms of digital footprints—IP addresses, pinging cell phones, surveillance cameras capturing your image at every turn. In accordance with what I had learned, I erased all the incriminating emails from my drafts, sent, and inbox folders. All but one, which blatantly outlined a plan for a rendezvous. I had deleted all call logs and texts. Except for those few phone calls I forgot about.

Worst of all, I hadn't considered that you can still get busted in the most analog ways. So when my live-in boyfriend stumbled upon my most deranged lovelorn musings in a journal I had left out, it was evidence so anachronistic, so juvenile in its sloppiness, it hadn't occurred to me to better obscure it. Ink on paper was what tipped him off, spurring him to comb my phone and computer for traces of what else I'd left behind.

At this point in the story, armchair analysts will speculate that I wanted to get caught. Maybe in the grand cosmic scheme of things, some part of me did. My boyfriend and I had been together for six years and lived together for three. We shared a rating system based on New York City mayors ("Is this shirt Giuliani or Fooliani? Dinkins or Stinkins?") and had adopted a Jack Russell-Chihuahua mix. We'd both recently turned 30 and had vague plans for what our wedding might look like—a taco truck and lots of dancing—but no hard plans for when that might take place or what we envisioned for the future. We'd grown comfortably into something between friends, roommates, and canine co-parents, so deeply ensconced in each other's lives that imagining an alternative seemed impossible.

But hurting the person I lived with for the happiest years of my life? Being thrown out of our home after he made his discovery? I had envisioned a slightly more graceful exit. The morning I left, the sun was just beginning to tinge the sky violet, and I walked away with our dog and a haphazardly packed suitcase of gym shorts and high heels.

For years, I had been interviewing men who had made great messes of their lives (pseudocide seems to be an almost universally male phenomenon—or maybe women do it just as much but don't get caught). Typically, when these guys get the idea to fake their deaths and then actually execute the plan, they are backed into a corner. They've cheated, they've lost millions of dollars of investor money, or they're attempting to shirk their debts to creditors by taking an easy way out. These are guys who make fools out of the family members who mourn them, who attempt to outsmart law-enforcement agents who are paid thousands of dollars of taxpayer money to search for bodies that never appear. And these guys often have a tidy excuse for why they've done it. I just couldn't get over the hubris it requires: to think that you can get what you want and get away with it at the same time.

* * *

I was at a writers' residency when I met him. He had been a favorite critic of mine for years, and I knew he lived nearby. I also knew he was married, and I had no other motive in mind (swear to goddess) when I shot him an email, asking for his literary insight. He drove over to the big white house that same afternoon, and we drank tea on the wraparound porch. The interview went well, my recorder and notebook out the whole time, though none of my notes made it into the book. He was, coincidentally, the precise demographic of the person most likely to fake his death: a middle-aged, middle-class, white, heterosexual man with a family. I felt pleased that I had met him, that I had made what might one day turn into a strong professional contact. I didn't think anything of it beyond that.

A few days later, he emailed me and suggested a walk. When he led me out to a sun-dappled field at the height of fall foliage and asked if he could kiss me, I probably shouldn't have been taken aback. I had been naïve enough to think that we would just be friends, that he could be interested in me as a platonic and intellectual equal. I made some resolution in my mind that this could be a litmus test that would help me figure out how I really felt about my boyfriend. We kissed. Looking back, it's painfully obvious that simply setting up the experiment gave me the answer I needed.

So we commenced what was intended to be a contained, three-week fling—one that would run the course of my residency. For him, a midlife crisis with an unthreatening nobody who would make him feel important. For me, a wildly affirming seal of approval that this person, who I thought was so brilliant, also thought I was at least a little brilliant.

While we were sneaking around, I found myself thinking a lot about a question I'd been asking since I'd begun my book. Where is the best place to disappear? While you'd think that a town out in the boondocks could get you good and gone, really, it turned out that the likelihood of running into someone you know was that much greater. We were always looking for places to hide.

***

I often shook my head at the people I interviewed, men who not only faked their death but also often philandered, and here I was, doing the exact same thing. Our affair was supposed to expire when I returned to my life and to my boyfriend in the city. But it didn't. The writer and I continued to see each other whenever he had to come to town. Though my dalliance lasted only six weeks before I got busted, I never thought I'd be someone for whom commitment would be a problem. I considered myself an honest person, with integrity. Now I was seeing how quickly those categories can crumble, and how it didn't happen out of malice. It just happened, through human weakness and self-absorption that I'd previously condemned.

I thought about a conversation I'd had with two private investigators in Manila, about the men they chased, men who faked their deaths because they had a girlfriend on the side, or a second family. "Why don't they just get a divorce?" I asked them. They joked that it was because the men were afraid of their wives. While I still contend that playing dead instead of dissolving a marriage is a bit extreme, I was beginning to understand. Inventing a new, separate self, while radical and deranged, is more appealing than confronting the mistakes the old self might have made.

What I had never been able to get my head around, though, is the way the fakers could compartmentalize their indiscretions. One father who had staged his death in a kayaking accident had determined that he didn't need to let his adult sons in on his plan because, as he explained to me, they were busy with their own lives and wouldn't miss him. Before I knew it, I was advancing the same rationalizations, a similar cockeyed logic to justify my cheating. I would be happier having this thing on the side, I thought, and also exceedingly guilty, so I would heap more affection onto my boyfriend. Everyone would benefit. How could I make out with another woman's husband? Simple. She was merely theoretical to me. A ghost. I absolved myself of responsibility in that department (save the pangs that popped up—serving Thanksgiving dinner to my family in our apartment, having drinks with my friends while constantly checking my phone for messages) more seamlessly than I felt comfortable with.

Keeping a secret always closes you in on yourself. But, as I had told the writer, I felt something expanding within me, too. I know now what it was. It was empathy. I saw for the first time how easy it is to continue making a mistake you know you are making. I could no longer look at the subjects in my book with the same derision. When I had gone astray, it closed off my relationship, but it eventually opened me up to a new honesty.

Privacy consultant Frank Ahearn had always called the death fakers who got caught "morons and idiots." I laughed along. But now I felt like both a moron and an idiot. "Learn from this," my boyfriend said when he told me to leave. I did learn. I learned just how hard it is to cover your tracks in the 21st century. I learned that I am not cut out for the sly skulking around that disappearing requires.

I also learned that you can hold two contradictory ideas in your head and that they don't cancel each other out. I loved my boyfriend. I felt love for the writer, too, or something like it. I wish I had stayed. I'm glad I got caught. And I didn't toggle between these ideas. I held them simultaneously.

Elizabeth Greenwood is the author of Playing Dead: A Journey Through the World of Death Fraud, which recently came out in paperback.

These Balenciaga's $850 Platform Crocs Sold Out Before They Were Even Officially Released

The spring/summer 2018 collections introduced the fashion circuit to the year's most unlikely "It" shoe—the Croc. And the divisive shoe has finally been given the ultimate stamp of approval.

Christopher Kane first hinted that the rubber sandals were making a comeback, when he debuted rock-emblazoned Crocs at his spring/summer 2017 show.

Christopher Kane made the case for Crocs at his spring/summer 2017 show
Getty ImagesCourtesy of Crocs

But it was Demna Gvasalia for Balenciaga which sealed the deal, as the designer introduced the FROW to a child-like take on the sandal.

And the 10cm "Foam" platform shoes have already proven to be a massive hit with fans after managing to sell out online before they were even officially released.

The Balenciaga shoes became available to pre-order on the Barneys website for a cool $850 on February 1, 2018, but sold out within a matter of hours. Tough luck for those hoping to bag a pair ahead of the next wave of fashion week shows...

And it's an impressive sale for the shoe once dubbed the "dad sandal," but the soar in interest further proves Gvasalia's sartorial pulling power.

And with everything from the label's '80s-inspired spandex leggings, to Ikea-inspired accessories, there's no telling what the designer will convince the millennial set to buy next.

These Exercises Can Improve Your Libido

Does it seem like your sex drive has come to a slow crawl or complete halt? Well, you can always try popping a libido-boosting supplement that is very much likely to be unregulated by the FDA or a similar agency in your country. Or you can simply perform a bunch of exercises that are known to help boost your sexual appetite.

What’s so nice about going the all-natural way is you don’t have to live on the edge — just because the manufacturer of a supplement formulated to enhance the libido says that it uses only herbal ingredients doesn’t necessarily mean it’s 100 percent safe and free of side effects.

The truth is even if a supplement contains active ingredients that come from nature, taking it still poses some risks most especially if it contains high amounts of those. And also, who’s to say what other substances are included in each and every pill that the manufacturer fails to print on the packaging?

So if you are having issues with your sex drive and you want to deal with it in the safest and most natural approach, then steer clear of those libido-enhancing drugs — including those that claim to be completely safe. What you need to do instead is perform the following exercise that can help increase your sexual appetite:

Walking Outside

It’s no secret that walking is one of the best exercises there is because it’s easy on the joints, unlike high-impact ones like jogging and running. What makes walking very good for increasing your libido is the fact that it gets the heart pumping, so it considerably improves blood circulation all over your body.

However, make sure that you walk outdoors during daytime if you want to bring back your lost sex drive. An important factor here is the sun, which is a wonderful source of vitamin D — a nutrient that increases both energy and sex drive levels. Do limit your sun exposure to not more than 20 minutes, and stay indoors between 10 am and 4 pm.

Doing Yoga

There’s a bunch of reasons why performing yoga on a regular basis is an excellent booster of the libido. First, it helps improve circulation of blood throughout your body, including your erogenous zones. Second, yoga helps decrease levels of stress and anxiety, both of which can definitely take away your sexual appetite.

Regularly doing yoga is also good for your figure as it helps lengthen your muscles, thus giving you a more flattering physique. This is a good thing for your libido because your self-confidence is boosted — and the more confident you feel, the less trouble you have with the thought of making love.

Lifting Weights

Are you aware that building lean muscles is a superb enhancer of a person’s sex drive? It all has something to do with the fact that lifting weights causes an increase in the levels of testosterone. In males, the said hormone is responsible for developing both primary and secondary sexual characteristics. Oh, and it also boosts sex drive!

Even though testosterone is a hormone commonly associated with males, females have it as well. And also, testosterone in females is also a role player in their sexual appetite. So women who want to bring their libido back into the scene may build lean muscles to enjoy increased testosterone levels.

Kegel Exercises

Both men and women alike can benefit tremendously from doing kegel exercises on a regular basis as it can help in increasing muscle tone down there in the most important erogenous zone, as well as boost sexual energy. As a bonus, kegel exercises also helps ward off urinary incontinence, which is common among aging people.

To do kegel exercises, all you have to do is isolate and contract the muscles of the pelvic floor for 10 to 15 minutes. It should be repeated several times per second, until you get tired of doing so. You are not going to have a hard time figuring out where your pelvic floor muscles are — they’re what you use to hold your pee in.

11 Characteristics Men Look For In Women (According To Science)

Love happens from the heart but the attraction is the first step towards love and attraction has scientific reasons. Science has shown that there are real biological traits behind the attraction.

According To Science, These Are The 11 Things Men Look For In Women.

1. The Hips Don’t Lie

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According to science men find 0.7 hips to waist ratio more attractive. That means if your waist is 70% of the circumference of your hips then its perfect.

2. Beautiful Breasts

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More tissues and fat is preferred by men. Almost 350 million women last year went under the knife for breast augmentation.

3. Beautiful Lips

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Beautiful lips and that too in red shade always get attention. Biologically bright red lips are a signal of youth and vitality.

4. Shiny Locks

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Biologically, Women who have strong locks are seen as well nourished and beautiful. This is the reason why hair products are so famous.

5. Scintillating Eyes

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The size of the eye, the shape of the eye and the size of pupil matters the most for man. The size of pupil changes according to the situation a woman faces.

6. Sunshine Smile

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A smile is the best non-verbal signal. Someone who smiles often and naturally is very desirable as a mate.

7. Body Fragrance

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Everyone has their own scents and that is what attracts a man. The attractiveness of a person is often determined by their natural scent.

8. Beautiful Back

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A woman with a 45-degree slope between her back and her butt is considered to be a more desirable mate for a man.

9. Maternal Instincts

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Women who have bright maternal instincts are very desirable as they are very keen to start a family.

10. Mesmerising Voice

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This is what men love the most. A mesmerising voice that kills all the stress.

11. Ambitions

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Men often want the woman to be ambitious about life. They want her to set goals and motos for life. An ambitious woman is very desirable.
Content Credit: storytellers.me

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